User blog:CITRONtanker/Cartoon Calamities Episode 6- Top 10 Lincoln Torture Episodes

What is a butt monkey character? Well, according to TV Tropes, a butt monket is "The character who is always the butt of the demeaning joke or the "put them through hell" plotline. For whatever reason, the Butt Monkey seems to walk through life with a permanent "Kick Me" sign attached to their backs, invisible to them, but all too visible to the rest of the world. Nothing ever goes right for this character, and if something bad is going to happen to someone, chances are it's going to happen to them. Long story short, it sucks to be the Butt Monkey." And for some reason, so many cartoons seem to have them. For example, Seasons 6 to 8 of Spongebob were gorged on Squidward torture episodes. Those were- just uncomfortable to watch. Not just with Squidward being put in misery, but also because they are never funny at all. How could anyone find a charatcer being tortured funny?

With eleven main characters (twelve if you count Clyde), it seemed like at least one of them had to be a butt monkey. And of course, the one they eventually chose was Lincoln. Needless to say- this poor kid never seems to catch a break. Entire episodes will devote themselves to putting him into a nightmare scenario he cannot control, and show him how weak and small he really is. Not suprisingly, I hate this plot hole- I hate it a lot. And it's the one area of this show being bad that the writers never seem to relent in. This is the point of this list. Let me state some ground rules. Got that? Then get ready for some rotten tales of my favorite family... Let us pray for poor Lincoln....
 * 1) I am disqualifying episodes in which Lincoln acted like a jerk, to the point where his punishment was justified (ex. Lincoln Loud: Girl Guru, Out on a Limo.)
 * 2) I am also disqualifying episodes in which the sisters stuped to Lincoln's level and got some kind of punishment (ex. Chore and Peace, It's a Loud, Loud, Loud, Loud House.)
 * 3) Episodes I have already reviewed are inelligable too (Study Muffin, No Such Luck)
 * 4) Finally, there are two episodes that belong on the list due to their horrible treatment of Lincoln, but they are gonna get their own reviews in the future, due to their other problems.

Number 5


(Music to listen to)

I debated including this episode on this list. Lincoln faces needless misery here, and his sisters do nothing to help him, but unlike the other episodes, he is, in a way, himself a product of his torture.

The episode begins with the Louds riding in the van to the Grand Venture Stae Park, and since they are all bored, Lucy offers to give everyone readings with her new fortune cards. One by one, the siblings get their fortunes revealed. Lincoln's however, is quite dark- it is implied his day will end in tragedy. Lisa tries to ensure Lincoln that it's just a fortune, and that it is highly unlikely it will come true. But as they stop at a gas station, the fortunes of the other sisters come true, causing Lincoln to become very worried about his own. Lisa still tries to tell Lincoln that his death won't happen. But just as they are about to enter the park, Lisa's fortune also comes true. Then there's this line-

Lisa: Lucy, I concede that your psychic predictions are uncannily accurate. And now, I'm off to show this fascinating creature to the park ranger. See you later, Lincoln! Well, maybe not.

The rest of the episode is just plain boring, seeing Lincoln take any and all precautonary measures, preventing him from having any fun. Why can't anyone just tell Lincoln to stop worrying, or if he is that worried, protect him? Not even his parents and trying to help him! And then there's that ending. Just because Lincoln saw the geyser erupt does not mean he loved the trip. Did he forget that 99.9% of his day was ruined? Ugh....

Also, for anyone who says that Lucy was the reason for Lincoln's torture, in her defense all she did was read a card. And I was not expecting her to stand up for Lincoln, for some reason.

Number 4


(Music)

If you wanted a box of cereal, that would be an easy affair, right? Not if you are Lincoln....

This entire thing is just Lincoln trying to do the right thing, but being shut down regardless. First things first- why are the sisters even here? It seems like their only purpose was to make Lincoln's task all the more impossible to him. And rule of thumb- those sisters will stomp Lincoln's dreams at any given moment. They do these outlandishly stupid things at the store, and eventually elevates to Lincoln being kicked out. There's also that kid that he has to chase around for his Zombie Bran, and he eventually gets it.

But as he leaves the store, with all the groceries and his cereal, the sisters notice the Zombie Bran, and whine and complain about how they did not get anything that they wanted. They then shun him for this little act, and then, this happens.

Luna is probably my favorite character of The Loud House, so to see her swipe the cereal from Lincoln and act like a bully to him was really disheartening to me. I thought Luna was a warm-hearted soul, gladly helping Lincoln out whenever he is in need of it! But this is just- character damaging.

Yes, Lincoln gets his cereal in the end, but that does nothing to redeem the rest of this thing.

Number 3


Lincoln gets tortured here, and no matter how hard he tries, he cannot win. I should give this a seperate review, because it literally has- nothing at all. It's pretty awful, I will give it at that. And I see no reason to give this stinky trash heap any attention right now.